Executive burnout can build quietly behind a successful career, through sleepless nights, guilt over layoffs and the loneliness of senior leadership. Gabrielle Pimstone spent 27 years in corporate psychology and says she lived it herself. In this conversation with Jeremy Van Wert, she describes what pushed her to change and how she found a purpose she could live.
ᛉKey takeaways
- Gabrielle says senior leaders pay a price that outsiders miss, including sleeplessness, guilt over restructures and deep loneliness.
- She describes her breaking point as waking up on a Sunday morning with intense anxiety about the week's video calls.
- Gabrielle believes that insight alone did not ease her anxiety, which led her to study energy work.
- She says a purpose only sticks when it is lived and tied to a call to action, not left as a slogan.
- Gabrielle shares four ikigai questions to start finding your purpose: what you love, what you are good at, what the world needs and what you can be paid for.
- She argues that people do not resist change when it moves them forward, and she encourages starting before a crisis forces it.
ᛃ Moments in this one
ᚠWhat executive burnout looks like behind the scenes
Executive burnout is easy to miss from the outside. Gabrielle Pimstone, an energy coach who spent 27 years in organizational psychology, says people look at senior leaders and see big salaries and delegation. In her experience, those leaders carry a price: sleeplessness, guilt and the burden of making decisions that change other people's lives.
She worked with leaders who felt burnt out, felt like imposters and felt lonely and disconnected in their roles. She also held senior roles herself, so she says she understood the stress firsthand. Jeremy, who was a CEO, says he sees the same thing in his therapy work and that very few people understand what it is like at that level.
ᚢLayoffs, restructures and why job security is a myth at the top
Gabrielle says that lying awake at night over having to let hundreds of people go is common among senior leaders. Change is constant in large organizations, and she says that each restructure affects people's lives and leaves leaders carrying guilt.
She describes work she did during the pandemic with an airline in Australia, where leaders had to make excruciating decisions about people's jobs. She remembers a room full of anxiety, sadness, shame and guilt. She also says that three CEOs she worked with lost their jobs after pushing change that their boards then stopped, and that she sees job security at the top as a myth.
Jeremy shares a similar experience of watching a board become nervous and focus on one issue, no matter how many wins an executive had delivered. If you have been through something like this and want to talk with someone who has been at the top, you can learn about Jeremy's background as a licensed therapist, MBA and former CEO.
ᚦThe Sunday blues and Gabrielle's breaking point
Gabrielle says her turning point came in 2020, during the pandemic, in a senior role at a bank. She realized within a week of accepting it that she had made a mistake, and she describes the politics as toxic. About eight months later she was not sleeping.
One Sunday morning at 6:00 she woke with intense anxiety, with butterflies in her stomach, and realized she had the Sunday blues about dialing into the next day's Zoom calls. That day she went for a walk, listened to a podcast about anxiety and decided she had to get out of the corporate bind. A physical health issue she had experienced before flared up again, which she took as a sign she could not ignore, and she resigned the next day.
She did go back to corporate work as a contractor, which she found more tolerable, and she used that time to study energy mastery. That is where her coaching work began.
ᚨWhy psychology alone didn't ease her anxiety
Gabrielle says she had been in therapy and psychology for decades and had immense self-insight. She understood her triggers and her story, and she had spoken about her father's death for years. Yet the anxiety kept getting worse, and her usual psychological tactics did not work.
She describes an energy block as an invisible handbrake. In her view, traumatic experiences carry an energetic stamp that stays with a person, and as later events reinforce it, a block forms. She says that in her own case, the block was stuck grief, anxiety and fear of loss.
These are Gabrielle's beliefs and personal experience, and the episode does not test them. When Jeremy asks if ADHD might involve an energy block, she says ADHD is physiological and that she would need to work with someone before saying anything about it.
ᚱWhat energy coaching looks like
Gabrielle says her coaching packages run from six weeks to a year and start with an inquiry into where a person is, where they want to be and what is in the way. She then does energy healings and activations and teaches tools in five areas: understanding your energy, protecting it, clearing blocks, maintaining it and optimizing it.
Her aim is to help clients shift from what she calls their human story, built on ego and past events, to a story about purpose, joy and flow. Gabrielle is describing her own practice and what she says clients experience, and this post does not promise any result.
ᚲFinding your purpose: four ikigai questions
In her last years in corporate work, Gabrielle helped organizations and leaders activate their purpose. She says a purpose with a capital P is one that is lived and drives decisions, and she found it hard to make that stick in organizations of tens of thousands. Her view is that culture evolves slowly, and that embedding purpose can take seven to ten years.
Gabrielle says she found her own purpose at 50: fulfilling potential together. She says you find it through introspection and know you have it when the words light you up. Jeremy adds that many high achievers reach midlife and ask why they feel so empty after doing everything right.
She shares four questions drawn from the Japanese concept of ikigai: What do I love? What am I good at? What does the world need? What can I be paid for? If you are asking those questions and feel stuck, Jeremy's retreat Light in the Mountains is a three-day small-group experience in the Sierra Nevada built for deeper work.
ᚷWhy most people wait for a catalyst, and how to leave the prison
Gabrielle says most people keep doing what they have been doing until they get a nudge or a kick. Her own catalyst was her health flaring up. She tries to teach people to look for an aha moment through self-discovery instead of waiting for a crisis.
She also rejects the idea that we resist change. In her view, people are wired for growth and do not resist change that moves them forward, and she thinks the comfort zone is often really a discomfort zone people do not leave. She quotes the poet Rumi: "Why do you stay in prison? The door is wide open."
For Gabrielle, the bars were a belief she uncovered: that staying hypervigilant would stop the rug from being pulled out. She links it to her father dying in the prime of his life. Once she examined it, she says, the bars disappeared. If you are weighing your own next step, the Mindful Mutiny community offers conversation, live Fireside Chats and a course library, and you can also book a private consultation with Jeremy.
Energy work is discussed as the guest's personal experience and beliefs, and it isn't a substitute for medical or mental health care. If you are struggling with anxiety or burnout, please consider speaking with a licensed professional.
ᚨ Questions people ask
What is executive burnout?
In this episode, Gabrielle describes it through the lived experience of senior leaders: sleeplessness, anxiety, guilt over restructures and loneliness. She says it can build behind a successful career before it becomes impossible to ignore.
Why are senior leaders so lonely?
Gabrielle and Jeremy both say very few people understand the pressure of the role. Jeremy notes that others assume power and money must be nice, while leaders carry difficult decisions and the effects on people's lives.
How do you find your purpose after a long career?
Gabrielle recommends introspection and offers four ikigai questions: what you love, what you are good at, what the world needs and what you can be paid for. She says you will know when the words you land on light you up.
Do people really resist change?
Gabrielle calls that a myth. She believes people are wired for growth and do not resist change that benefits them, but that most need a compelling reason, or catalyst, to start.